Thursday, November 30, 2006

Difficulties...But I Worked Through It Like A Trooper

I was asked by Gladys, my partner in crime {at the church hahaha ironical!} to write the Seasonal Message from our place-where-we-worship. Not knowing when the deadline was, I decided to tackle it today & get it over with.

This was an incredibly hard task for me. I am struggling with a loss that I am getting grief counseling for, & the first couple drafts were so depressing that I sat in front of the monitor with tears running down my face. I questioned the wisdom of giving me this assignment, when the Christmas season always makes me want to lock the door & turtle under a blanket in the fetal position. Finally, I finished up, & gave it to Puffy to critique. "It's good," he says. "Not too depressing to read in the paper as the official Christmas message from the church?" I query. "No. It's good." Now, boys & girls, we all know that Puffy is a very supportive man, husband {HA! that still makes me laugh} so of course I didn't believe him.

I sent a copy to Gladys. She also says it is completely acceptable. So, I guess I must believe them. But still, doubt lingers. Now, do all creative people doing creative things doubt their creativity? Maybe. It may surprise you to know that this self-proclaimed super-genius does not know the answer to that. And also suffers from self-doubt on a semi-regular basis. Yes, reality creeps in occasionally.

All I know is, the Christmas season is especially sad for me this year, & though I'm trying to analyze & deal with constant weepiness, I'm still struggling.

Oh yeah, & the deadline for the Christmas issue of the paper is December 15th. Just so you know. I'm done FIFTEEN days ahead of time. This is definitely a record for the Queen of Procrastinators. Just so you know. You may treat me to a drink in acknowledgement.


Anonymous said...

I feel quilty for suggesting that you write the article....I did not realize that you had issues around loss..I am so SORRY. THe article and creativity that you put into the article is just what we needed to say. You are special to me, to the church as well as the community. Thanks again for your super genius writing ability.
AND TWO WEEKS AHEAD OF SCHEDULE...that is amazing! But then you have proved over and over again that you are amazing!!! Smiles,hugs..Gladys

Wilma said...

No worries Gladys. These things just make us stronger people.